Monday, January 26, 2009

Not Me Monday


Monday arrives again....right on time. Before the first bell rings, it is time to share what I didn't do last week. Thanks again to MckMama for being the originator of all this insanity.

I did NOT pine away for NFL games as the league helps wean us off of football this weekend. I did NOT secretly wish for the XFL or USFL to begin again. I do NOT hope that Kurt Warner has an amazing game next Sunday...because his story is NOT at all interesting, unusual, or inspiring.

I did NOT stay up too late all week last week for little to no reason. As an educator, that is not something that is responsible. I did NOT 'phone in' two lessons this week with little to no preparation. I am always prepared. I do NOT secretly hate the month of January because it is NOT still half a year away from freedom.

I did NOT allow myself to get irritated at Addsy, this week. I would NOT ever do that. She did NOT throw a toy in anger after refusing to follow a directive. Since, I am the calm mature type of dad, I did NOT pick up same toy and throw it two rooms away just to prove my superiority in the skill of throwing.

I did NOT secretively wonder if Itty Bitty will do something that I never did...play in the NFL. I did NOT wince in pain as she ran to give me a hug and.... guys, I do NOT need to finish that sentence do I?

My girls and I did NOT play a game of 'football' in the living room Friday. We did NOT have fun...and both of the them absolutely did NOT take me down.

It is NOT Addsy's birthday today! We did NOT have her birthday party yesterday. We did NOT see all of our loved ones as we did NOT celebrate the third year of her birth. I did NOT realize how little she resembles the baby of 2006 and how much she resembles Sneaky Momma's old first grade class. I also did not, from a range of about twenty five yards, kick a Nerf soccer ball with a majestically curving arc to land directly on said birthday girl's forehead. I also did NOT celebrate the achievement with those all around me after checking on Addsy...who by the way thought it to be funny as hell, too. I did NOT suffer with Sneaky Momma as lack of sleep finally caught up with us last night.

Speaking of Sneaky Momma, she did not work her butt off to make sure the party, cake, etc was spectacular. She did NOT make the coolest/warmest quilt for our dear Addsy.

As for the far away history, I did NOT get way more comments about my fictional 'Green Eggs and Ham' then I truly expected. I really am ashamed, dear Reader(s), that I took a cheap shot at humor by quoting Dr. Seuss. In the future, I will NOT quote some famous book, person, or movie/TV character simply because they used the word NOT in their quote.

By the way, I did NOT inhale.


-----Lane

10 comments:

Mama SeWELL said...

Ok Mr. Clinton, we will believe you on that. Ha! Thanks for making me laugh today, with your throwing abilities, the wincing, and the sneaky Sat. morning I'll say you guys had a fun filled weekend!
Happy Monday!

-stephanie- said...

Funny stuff...Mr. Clinton.


Happy Birthday to your daughter.

Anonymous said...

I loved hearing not me's from a Daddy's perspective. And happy b-day to your little girl!

Anonymous said...

You crack me up and I did not inhale either! That's funny that your green eggs and ham comment earned you so much feedback.

Jill @ Sneaky Momma said...

I so wished we would have caught the amazing 30 yard soccer ball kick to the head on video. $10,000 easily.
Thanks so much for the compliments, hon. It was all possible because you played 'Mr. Mom' so that I could get all that done. :)

Wayne said...

Hey lane in answer to your question Tribute tuesday is a tribute to any person you wish to pay tribute too wether it be a family member or friend or even a sports person. or just someone who has inspired you I look forward to reading your tribute tuesday

Elyse said...

Aspiring your daughter to be in the NFL...what a dream girl and the first one too. Love that you played "football" with the girls too. And as for throwing the toy...HILARIOUS :)
~Elyse~

Kaleena said...

Love your Not Me's! You're too funny! Glad to hear that you play football with the girls...we need more girls interested in the sport. And, the hitting the birthday girl in the head with the Nerf was just plain funny! Way to go!!!

Liz {Learning To Juggle} said...

Too funny!! Sounds like a great birthday for Addsy - soccer ball to the head and all!!!

Now I am off to check out your Green Eggs and Ham tribute (don't know how I missed that one!!)

Kalei said...

Even though you are cheering for Kurt Warner, I still think your funny....great not me's! Happy b-day to itty bitty and i hope you all are recovering nicely =).....go Steelers! =)