First 5 Friday-Jill Speaks

Sneaky Momma is the love of my life. She is kind, funny, beautiful, and smart. I hang on every word she says (unless there is a close game or a rerun of Scrubs on) and I don't think I could ever imagine a better mother for my kids. However, one of the best things is the 'Jillisms' over the years.

She has said some things over the years that have been hilarious and head scratching all at the same time. So, in honor of my beloved...

First 5 Friday Jillisms.

5. "Um, you know...yeah." The first year of our blessed relationship would start with that as she would decided that what she was thinking wasn't important.

4. "Good Cow" At first I just thought this was an elementary way (she used to teach that age) to say "Holy Shit!" But, she was truly the first one I ever heard say it. As I grew to know her I found that it was a saying her grandmother used to say.

3. "I was thinking..." I am lazy by nature. Of all of the seven deadly sins, the one that hits me the most is sloth. So, as I am sitting in my comfy recliner and I hear those three words, I know that whatever comes next is going to cause me to work. My hon is a great idea lady. She can find every way there is to skin a cat. As her mind works like a finally tuned sports car, my mind is run by hamster on a wheel.....I call him Roy. He also is inclined to laziness. By the way, she has tried to trick me by changing her beginning to "Let me throw this out at you.."

2. "I'm just kidding....not really." Our conversations were splattered with this gem. She would say it with a smile and I never was for sure if she was kidding or not. So, I just grinned quizzacly usually. I found out as I began to know her better...nope, she really wasn't kidding.

1 Wow, that is a beautiful field of Indian Paint brushes." This beauty was only said once as it is definitely a situational comment. We had spent a long hard three days in the Hill Country where I had been hooked in the finger while catching a bass and my lovely city girl had spent more time away from easy driving distance of Target than she ever had before. We were tired and slightly bummed as she, always trying to find the silver lining was commenting on the beauty of the land.

As I looked over in the direction of the Indian Paint brushes I noticed something about them. "Honey," I said, "that's not flowers...that's a field of dirt."

We laughed the rest of the trip.

She has always fit my ideal woman. I have always asked God for a person who I could spend my life laughing with...and boy, did he deliver. I hoped you enjoyed this personal First 5.

Writer's Workshop-Remembering When

Another week and another Writer's Workshop...these were the prompts. Be sure to run by Mama Katt's place and play along with the group.

1.) Define goodness...joy...sorrow...and anger using pictures you've taken.

2.) Tomorrow I will do it differently. Here's how...

Wake up on time...snooze five minutes less.

3.)Describe a 'sound' from your childhood. What was it? When did you hear it? What does it bring to mind?

The sound is a paddle striking my butt. It brings pain. That is all.

4.) I remember when...

See Below.

5.) Right now is the best time to start. What's your first step?

To the Fridge to get a beer. I'll start tomorrow.

I remember when we had recess. I remember compulsory nap time and when the biggest responsibility I had involved homework. I remember spankings and hugs. I remember being taught (with extreme prejudice) that men held doors open for women, to look both ways before crossing the street, that guns are tools that can kill, and that cars are similar to guns. I was taught that life is not a video game. That what I do does matter to the people around me. I remember when I drove to school with two rifles on my gun rack and nothing was ever mentioned about it. I remember a time before Columbine.

I remember when sports was more innocent. The heroes or villains came to life on the TV. The Babe could hit a baseball to the moon and we didn't hear how he could drink an ocean of bourbon. The nicknames were almost comic book like in their sound..Captain America and Broadway Joe to give a couple of examples. That controversy in sports was limited to 'Should we have the Designated Hitter?' or 'Should instant replay be used?' Steroids was something used only for medical reasons and dog fighting was only done in 3rd world countries.

I remember when adults were treated with a bit more respect. As an educator, I have no idea how it happened that a kid has more power in the school district than any employee. I remember when we were punished 'for our own good.' I also remember that few days went by without licks being given. I remember when Americans were more interested in teaching their children to survive in this world. How parents taught their children that life isn't always fair and that to be a man (or a woman) living in this world, you had best understand it. I remember when folks looked at their situations and thought 'How can I better myself?' not 'What does this country owe me because ___________'.

I remember when America was the trendsetter. Before 1776 no other country had a plan like the one we were proposing. In 1787 when things were going badly in America, we had the balls to rip the whole thing up and start all over. I remember a time when the rest of the world looked to us to solve problems. Whether it be World War II or the response to Communism we were always the leader. I remember when we didn't fear risk or pissing a few people off. Sure, I also remember the failings of this attitude...slavery and the Trail of Tears....but I also remember the great successes of this stance....D-Day and the Declaration of Independence. I remember when socialism was a dirty word in this country and where people would laugh out loud at the very thought of emulating any other country in anything. (Like health care or education)

Oh, yeah, I Remember the Alamo.

I remember learning that life is fleeting. From the works of Shakespeare to the westerns of Clint Eastwood, I learned that death awaits just around the corner. I remember that this is what makes human beings special. This foreknowledge of our fate allows...no...forces us to live life to its fullest. The 'gift' of knowing our mortality separates us from the other creatures...well, that and opposable thumbs and a driver's license. I remember the people who have left before me. I remember my grandparents who showed me that dignity and honor in life is greater than gold. I remember my best friend who in the midst of disease that was slowly and painfully killing him before his thirtieth birthday, never asked 'Why me?' and gave me an example of Christianity that will never leave me. I remember a brother in law who was killed as his wife was pregnant with his new son. I remember it every day.

Finally, I remember that the true gift of this life is love. It is the most valuable commodity we have. Wealth can be spent and health can fade away, but true love is the most enduring thing in this life. This is somethiing God has seen to bless me with and it is something that I am everyday thankful for. When I look at Jill I see understanding and something that is deeper than I sometimes can comprehend.

On days that drift into negativity it's a good think that I can remember.



Shameless promo....First 5 Friday will deal with the one the only SNEAKY MOMMA and her eccentricities. So, tune in Friday for 'em.

Finale First 5

Don't worry, there should be a First 5 Friday next week, but the topic of this week is series finales (In honor of Scrubs going off into the sunset). They are touching, poetic, and sometimes bizarre. I will not bore you with the Newheart finale (seriously, it was all a dream?) or the big fight with Will and Grace (Least favorite finale, by the way) I will also be totally honest with you, I have not seen all the series ever created and so this list will be slightly limited in that regard. But, I hope that my subtractions don't take away from the way these five series ended. It's almost worth looking for them on TV Land or WGN just to see them again.

First 5 Friday-Greatest Series Finales

5. Star Trek the Next Generation-The title of it was 'All Good Things' In this the Captain is sent through time by a godlike character, 'Q'. The captain sees how things will be like in the future and gets to remember life in the past as Captain of the Enterprise. This episode allows charatcers that had left to show up again and does a VERY good job of allowing closure to the characters. Jordi can see with his 'new' eyes. Worf and Riker make up after the death. To be perfectly honest, this was the slickest finale I ever saw..pure action...with a taste of reunion with it. By the way, in my humble opinion, this by FAR was the best Star Trek series ever.

4. Frasier-It had the usual over board behavior as the Crane boys planned out their Dad's wedding (chinese acrobats?). But, I guess what made this one the best was Frasier finally going out on a limb and going to Chicago, to start a new life. This time with a lady love. Daphne and Niles had their baby and Martin got Married. Especially in TV Land, where change is the rule, all of the Cranes had tremendous life changes. It was a good time to begin again...or in our case...end with Frasier again.

3. Friends-Could've been better. For what my expectations going into the show, I thought it was going to be the best one ever. But, to show you the its depth it was still an amazing finale, considering it disappointed. The Bings move out of the apartment and all of the keys line up on the counter was very cool. The Ross and Rachel thing was finally solved...happily. It was a decent end to a great show, that's why it's high on my list..

2. Scrubs-Sure maybe it was because it just happened, this finale was amazing. It had the usual humor as JD goes through his last day at Sacred Heart. But, it looked like it sought for the audience to have closure and understand that all was going to be just fine with the characters they loved. The last scene as JD goes through and basically has almost all the memorable patients, staff (not the major ones), and other random people based in the show line up as he gets nods and little pieces of their character thrown at him. (i.e. "I didn't kill her." and "Good Bye Five!! From the Big Dog!!") Maybe one of the more memorable moments in any series finale ever.

1. MASH-Every major character had his/her own storyline in this episode. From Father Mulcahy to Major Winchester's homemade POW band all getting killed in a random bombing, it tugged at your heartstrings. Watching the final shot as Hawkeye is taking off in a helicopter, the words 'goodbye' are plastered on the ground for Hawkeye and for the audience. Cheesy, yes. But, pure greatness. In my mind this ended the greatest series ever created.

Hope you enjoyed this weeks First 5 Friday!!

Fun and Games With Jenners-Mixed Up Genres

I hope you guys all decide to have a little fun at Jenner's place and play her new game. Here are my attempts at trainwrecks.

Interview With A Muppet
By Anne Rice and Jim Hinson

"So, what makes you think that you're not a real frog?", the boy asked.

His visitor stayed in the shadows and replied in a surprisingly non croakish way, " I am told that you collect stories."

"Yes," the boy said not looking at his visitor as he sorted through old cassette tapes, "as long as they are good."

"Well, then, whenever you are ready."

The boy popped the cassette in and said, "So, when did you first learn that you were not a frog like the rest?"

The green visitor held his ....well whatever up and stopped the boy.

"No, that is not how I want to begin."

"How would you like to proceed then?" The boy asked.

"I think I would like to tell it from the beginning." The boy leaned back and listened as the visitor continued. "My name is Kermit the Frog. It was 1979 when I noticed something amiss. While other frogs were jumping in the water and had smooth skin, I was different. First of all, my skin was not coarse...but felt. Secondly, I had a hand up my ass."

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Get A Lawyer Charlie Brown
by Charles Shultz and Edgar Allen Poe

The barren waste of my my mind retched as the teacher went on blissfully unaware of what I planned. Yes, it would happen soon...very soon. Murder I planned...cruel, sweet, delightful murder.

"Hey, Chuck."

That detestable Peppermint Patty always seemed to place herself in the way of my thoughts. I sighed and looked around.

"Did you guys win any baseball games, Chuck? You guys were really bad, weren't you?"

Confound it!! Was she really this stupid? The world would be well rid of this closeted wench of a child, but no the true target of my wrath was my best friend's sister. Lucy. She would pay. How she had mocked me? The number of times she had played on my unwitting trust only to pull the ball from me! She would pay. But, with Patty, I had to be smart..I had to cunning. I could not allow her any inkling of what I planned.

"We'll be better next year, I know it." I said convincingly. If she only knew that my efforts would be directed into different directions she would be shocked. They all would be...

"Wah wah wah wah wahhhwaah."

"Yes, Ma'am. I'm sorry, we won't talk without permission again." Easy, Charlie, do not allow anyone foreknowledge of your plans. Lucy will be no more as long as you keep your mind on your task.
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The Menace of Christmas
by Louis Lamour and Dr. Seuss

Alcohol cut a wide swath in heart, just like a creek after a hard rain . He had spent many days out here wondering what life really had to offer. Once a man of stature, he had drunk himself into a stupor that only brief moments of sobriety shone through the clouds of inebriation. Now, he had nothing to show, but the discoloration of his skin.

He had, like others of his ilk, had decided to live on the fringes. The others, down below his simple dwelling, lived for laughter. But the laughter died in his heart when the alcohol entered it. He lived for vengeance, not for any disservice any man had done him, but for the cruelest measure of hatred his maker had placed upon him. For being born. The name Grinch was to be his handle.

So, as the Who's in Whoville decided to begin their celebration, Grinch, made his own preparations. Hell, was going to hit Whoville and with it so was the Grinch...and Max.
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>The Good the Bad and The Ugly
by Dr. Seuss

See the man, the man has no name.
The man has hair of gold, so Blondie is how he's known.
See the other man. Tuco is his name. He plays a game.
The game is with a gun..and he isn't the only one.

The blonde man and Tuco with the fun gun ride out.
They are looking for a man in black. It is he they want to attack.
He has a gun, it is no fun. All wish to have fun with the gun and attack the man in black.

All of them are bold as the search for gold, under a stone all alone lies the gold to be given to the bold, who play with guns only for fun as Tuco and Blondie attack the man in Black.
-----------------------------------
Harry Potter and The Precious Prince
by Danielle Steele

Eighteen is a hard time to be a man. For Harry Potter, this was doubly true. He had fought the greatest evil of all time, Lord Voldemort. He was held in the highest regard of all the wizards in the free world. Yet, there was something missing.

He had left things unspoken with Ginny Weasley, his best friend's sister. He had broken up with her as he set out on the quest to rid the world of Lord Voldemort, but now the awkwardness of this set his limbs abuzz with goosebumps. The stolen moments in the common room of Hogwartz and the brief pass of love in the stark home of the Weasleys had made this awkwardness almost a constant companion. The chill of his bones over this only got colder as he apparated just outside the burrow.

Harry took a deep breath as he knocked on the door.

A witch opened it, just not the one he expected.

"Hello, Harry."

Hermoine Granger was the smartest one in his class and the girlfriend of his best friend Ron Weasley. Apparently, this meeting with Ginny would have spectators. Harry nodded and walked in.

As he sat down, he noticed the burrow slightly less crowded as the place where Fred Weasley sat was vacant. He winced at the thought of Fred, dead on the floor back at Hogwartz. A noise of someone walking down the stairs shook him out of his trance. It was Ginny.

Her red hair flowing, her smile was smoldering, as Harry, too bewitched to move, allowed her to pass. As she went by him, her touch blazed fire on his hand.

"'Ello, Harry." She spoke softly, but with a hint of something to come, as she sat down beside him.

The two wizards in their own world looked upon each other as if for the first time. Wands forgotten, words forgotten, all that mattered were their eyes and the silent messages that was being sent forth. They leaned in simultaneously as their lips searched for the others....
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Gosh, that was fun!! Give it a shot yourself at Jenners!!

First 5 Friday-My Bucket List

A while back, I watched a pretty damn good movie with Morgan Freeman (does he make bad movies?) and Jack Nicholson called 'The Bucket List.' Most of you are probably familiar with the movie, but for the rest of you, it's basically a list that you want to accomplish before you 'kick the bucket'. We all have our own list I'm sure, but I think I'll share the First Five that I have yet to accomplish.

5. Conquer my fear of singing in public. I would love to get on the main stage of Billy Bob's and sing some great musical composition. Of course, I would start a whole 'nother fear. Everyone else's fear of my singing.

4. Visit Washington DC. As a bit of a history buff, there is no place in this country that has more history and tradition, than the halls of DC. From the phallic object signifying the father of our country to the Great Emancipator sitting like the guy from that old commercial. (You know the guy has his butler play the song, "Ride of the Valkryies" on the phonograph and all of his crap starts sliding from the sound. Tried to find it on you tube, but couldn't.)

3. Stand on the sidelines of a Cowboys football game. Don't get me wrong, I have no interest in going to a game unless I'm in a box or on the field. Hangin' in out with the unwashed masses would not be my idea of a last hurrah.. Plus, if I'm going to fight that traffic, it better be worth it. By the way, if I do get inoperative cancer, the Cowboys better not suck.

2. Visit Hawaii. Not sure what I'll do on the fifty hour flight up there and back. But, I have always wanted to see the Island State and all the beauty it possesses. Play a round on a golf course that has literally fifty different colors of green on it...unlike some of the ones down here in Texas with the three different colors of yellow and brown.

1. Play in the World Series of Poker Main Event. Imagine the rush. Playing against some of the best players in the world and some of the worse players in the world. The first day alone would be cool with lots of 'players' dressing up in costume. It is like Mardi Gras.

I hope this gave you a lot to consider as, unless you are hindu or have some belief in reincarnation, we only get one go around on this ride. So, you might as well see the sights, such as the are.

Writer's Workshop-What Am I Gonna Do?

It is time again to participate in the greatness that is 'Writer's Workshop.' Join Mama Katt and the rest of us as we take on one or more of the following prompts.


1.) Who really helped you get over something? Write about that person.
(writingfix.com)

My wife. She says pretty much the right thing to get me back into a more positive state of mind, but I think this is one that I'll save for another post another day.

2.) Is plastic surgery an option? Without being vulgar, write about the body part still attached to you that you would most like to dis-attach and replace with a better one.
(writingfix.com)

Hmm, but I was told size wasn't everything.

3.) Share an interesting email exchange you've had with someone lately.


4.) Have you thought about shutting down your blog? Why haven't you and what would cause you to make that decision final?

I've actually thought about going on hiatus until this summer mainly because of my lack of time during the tennis season. I admit I'm not the most ardent reader during this time mainly because I work twelve to fourteen hour days during the week. Add this with my 'other' hobby, playing virtual cards, I have little to no time to write and read. But, I do love the challenge this day brings out. I do thank all of you that wander by and waste time on my blog.

5.) Today I will..


Hmm, I think we have a winner.

Today, I had so much planned. This is the actual week that is the most intense week of my job. Friday, we get to see if all of the hard work I put in trying to get the kids in my class to learn history paid off or not. Saturday, I am responsible for running a district tennis tournament with sixteen teams all descending on our town for a long day. All week this week was going to be spent planning for this blessed event.

Until swine flu shut us down.

So, what am I to do with this unplanned vacation? Well, it looks like I am going to get to spend a LOT of family time hangin' with the girls. But, let's look at the list of other things I could do today.

*Mow/Clean up the yard
*Help clean house
*Catch up on the month and a half of lesson plans that I have not done yet.
*Lay around
*Throw stuff at the cat.
*Play poker on line
*Go to a casino
*Watch an obscene amount of TV (Note I did NOT say watch obscene TV)


Well, seems like a long list, there is no way I can do all of that today. Let's see if I can shorten it up a little bit and take out the stuff I know I will not do. Hmm, Mow/Clean up the yard. No can do. Mother Nature's rain has taken that choice away. So, we can scratch that off the list. Okay, next on the list, Help Clean up the house. Okay, first I have to ask a question, is anyone coming over? If the answer is no, then so is my opinion of cleaning the house. Cool, two off the list.

This is easier than I thought.

Catch up on the month and a half of lesson plans I haven't done. Puh-lease. If they tell me I must go home, then why oh why would I do school work? That seems downright Un-American. If I have a day off I must do things that would be in line with this. Okay, so in a nutshell, there will be no work done by me in the house (other than being a walking jungle gym). So, let's look at the rest of the list.

*Lay around
*Throw stuff at the cat.
*Play poker on line
*Go to a casino
*Watch an obscene amount of TV (Note I did NOT say watch obscene TV)


Well, we can throw out Go to a casino. I am broke as a joke, so I can't contribute to those poor Indians in Oklahoma or the crazy Cajuns in Louisiana. Hmm, seems like Lay around and play poker on line can be accomplished at the same time. You know, I bet I can probably watch an obscene amount of TV at the same time. Who says I can't multi task?

I think this is doable...oops I forgot to throw something at the cat...hang on. Check. Mission Accomplished!

I hope your day is just as filled as mine looks to be.

FIRST 5 FRIDAY-Dark Moments in Time

I was in class the other day as we were preparing for the almighty state mandated history test and an interesting conversation took place as we talked about the 2nd Amendment (Right to bear arms).

Unknown student trying to get me off task: "Coach, so, if we didn't have guns, would that thing at Columbine happened?"

Me: "I think that some people are prone to violence, and so yeah, it probably still would've happened. Harris and Klebold would've gotten the guns somehow no matter if they were legal or not."

Same Student: "Coach, is that like the worst thing that ever happened in our country?"

Me: "Um, no."

SS: "What is the worst thing?"

Me: "Moving on, the 3rd Amendment...."

But, this student unwittingly gave me this week's First 5 list...even if it's really one that I'm not enjoying overly much.

FIRST 5 DARKEST MOMENTS of US HISTORY:

5. Columbine School Shooting, April 20, 1999. This moment in time changed the culture of the schools from a place of safety to just another part of society. When those kids starting shooting at their classmates, an era of fear began in the schools. Even now when I read accounts some ten years later I think, "Man, what a waste." Now, there are little kids with an inferiority complex and a need to 'be somebody' who choose to copy cat Harris and Klebold. It's simply disgusting.

4. Pearl Harbor, December 7th, 1941. "A date which will live in infamy." It was cowardly, it was pure murder...not an act of war. However, it was also a moment where the evil of the Japanese Empire's actions still didn't overshadow our own naivety. We should've been more aware, but we chose blissful existence to proactive vigilance. The one bright spot is this got us full board into perhaps the most necessary war in the last 150 years.

3. The Trail of Tears, beginning 1831. This is racism at it's finest. An area inhabited by Indians is wanted by the white man, so President Andrew Jackson bends down to the will of his constituency and his own prejudices and moves them forcefully. Some tribes fight with conventional weapons...the Cherokee fight the White Man's way...the sue and win. Jackson then ignores the ruling and thousands of Cherokee Indians are forced from their homes (yep..not tee pees) and are moved from the eastern states to an Indian area west of the Mississippi River. To break it down, we stole land, we broke our own rules of law, and then we made a people travel in horrid conditions a thousand miles and more. Sick.

2. The Institution of Slavery, From 1610?-1865. Since the first slave was brought to Jamestown in the early 1600's slavery was the perfect example of man's inhumanity to man. Africans were worked mercilessly, whipped, and sold from their families. The slave owners used cruelty, fear, and even the Bible to keep their charges in submission. "Doesn't it say obey your Master?" It took the deadliest war in American history to end this plague...and feelings still haven't died totally even 150 years later.

1. 9/11, September 11, 2001. Maybe the defining moment of this generation were an enemy chose to attack in a shocking and cowardly way. (Maybe it's just me, but any time you choose to kill women and children it's cowardly) The best part and worst part of America was on display as the nation's shock was evident. I'm not going to say all of the things that occurred during this time, but I will mention the Aggie and OSU game that year three weeks or so showcased a red white and blue stadium in memory of the event.



These five times show us at our worst...but, sometimes, it's when you hit bottom when the heroes come out. Hope the list this time makes you think a little bit about where we've come and maybe where we are going.